Some rapes are not as bad as others. Some rapes are less traumatizing than others, or should I say more acceptable than others, given that the people who write this kind of garbage are making excuses for rapists.
I was fourteen years old the night my friend G took me to my first kegger. We told my mom we were going to “a little get together.” I remember almost nothing about the evening—flashes, mostly. I remember absolutely nothing about being raped that night.
I might never have known about it, except that N--a woman I’d met the night before--mentioned it casually the next morning when I woke in a strange house with what might have been my first hangover.
So, I’ve been toying with the idea of commenting on the globally notorious Steubenville rape trial, and the subject of rape in general. And I almost decided against it – because it’s a little controversial, isn’t it? It’s not something we talk about. That’s what we do with rape. We keep it quiet. We stay silent. And that’s how we help to ‘feed’ a rape culture. So, silence be damned. And, while I’m aware that rape is not limited to women and girls, this piece is about society’s attitudes towards rape and women, so I’ll be using the female pronoun.